July 30, 2011
That’s right, it’s gone!!!! My PET scan was negative (aka no cancer cells). It’s amazing what only two months of chemo can do…and not to mention, the hundreds of prayers that you all have been saying! I know how blessed I am to have been healed so quickly. I apologize for not posting sooner, but I have been busy visiting my sister and her family in Virginia.
Before we got the results, I had been picturing the two scenarios in my head of getting good news or getting bad news. When I thought about the doctor telling me that the cancer was still there, it just didn’t seem right. But I figured, it didn’t seem right the first time in May either so it is a possibility. But when I pictured the doctor telling me my scan was clear, I couldn’t wait to feel that relief and excitement as if I knew it were in my future.
The big day, the morning of my PET scan was actually one of the most terrible mornings I’ve had in a long time. I got to the hospital at 7am, dreading getting the IV for my scan a little bit, but nonetheless ready to get it over with. Apparently I was only mentally prepared for one needle stick, because I kinda lost it after the second nurse came in and failed to successfully insert the IV on the second stick. A few tears and a couple of sticks later, a third nurse finally got the IV in on the fourth try. I knew it wasn’t the nurses’ faults. My veins are just getting more and more difficult to work with. As I was getting poked over and over, I began to realize that I’m not even half way through my chemo, and each time I get an IV, the number of attempts to place it goes up. So not only the pain and anxiety of needles piercing my skin was wearing on me that morning, but the realization that I’m going to have to get a port or PICC lines in my veins to be able finish my 8 more treatments of chemo. After my scans, I had to get some bloodwork done…more needles. At least it only took two more tries. So leaving the hospital with four different-colored bandages to cover the six places I had been stuck that morning on top of trying to push the thoughts about the results of the scan to the back of my mind, I was emotionally spent. So I went home and slept.
The doctor was supposed to call us that afternoon, but to be honest I’m glad he didn’t. I just could handle anything else that day whether it was bad or good. So the next day on my way to Virginia, my mom talked to the doctor in the car and we got the results we had hoped for! In the moment, there wasn’t as much as excitement as there was relief. Relief that the cancer cells were gone of course, but more than that the relief of simply knowing.
It’s funny how from the beginning of this, even though I’ve had my doubts, I’ve still always known at the end of the day that I was going to be cured. I guess there is no such thing as expecting too much from God. I could not have gotten here without all of the prayers and support that you all have provided. Thank you x 1000.
Though my lymphoma is technically gone already and I am in remission, I still have a long road of chemo ahead of me. Assuming everything goes according as scheduled, I should be done with my last treatment on November 9th. I figured that knowing I was healed would make me feel better about finishing out my chemo, but it kinda makes it more difficult because I feel like the only thing the chemo is doing now is frying my veins and taking away the rest of my hair. But I know it’s for good reason…I definitley don’t ever want to have to do this (chemo) again. The doctors told me if I was cured in two months, a cool statistic says I have a 90% chance that it won’t ever come back. I like that one!
Well, chemo again this Wednesday. I’ll continue to keep praying, believing, and conquering from one treatment to the next. Your prayers and encouragement have been so awesome. Did I say thank you yet? 😉
Jesus looked at them and said, “With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.” -Matthew 19:26
IN A NUTSHELL
- I’M IN REMISSION!!!!! THE CANCER IS GONE!!
- Though my lymphoma is gone, I am still conquering. I have 8 more treatments of chemo until November
- Wow. I am in awe of how great the Lord has been to me. And I cannot express to you how thankful I am for your daily encouragement and prayers…they have gotten me this far and are keeping me going