October 20, 2011
Well, my fragile immune system finally got the best of me. I got sick last week. The cold-like symptoms weren’t too terrible, and I had to get on antibiotics because I had fever. The worst part about it was getting sick the day before my chemo last Wednesday. My condition wasn’t bad enough for me to postpone my treatment, so I had to get chemo on top of feeling bad. My 10th treatment was probably the worst. I felt like I was going to pass out after I got my picc line, and as it has the past couple of times, just the smell of the waiting room in the infusion center immediately triggered my nausea and made me feel as if I’d already received the chemo. And I was extremely disappointed to break my 8-year-vomit-free streak ….I kinda had a personal goal to get through the 6 months of chemotherapy without throwing up any. I only threw up a little bit, though.
In addition to the after-effects of chemo and being sick in the days that followed, the taste left in my mouth from the chemo was horrible and made eating and drinking difficult. Water made me nauseous and juice didn’t cut it either. After I completed my 3 days of antibiotics, I was starting to feel better the Friday after treatment, but on Saturday I slept all day and got another fever. So my mom, who was also sick, and I had to pay a midnight visit to Vanderbilt to get some blood tests, and I ended up getting sent home with more antibiotics at 3am. After a rough week, I’m glad to say that I feel pretty good again today and the chemo-taste finally wore off, so I can enjoy food and drink again.
The best part about this week is…I only have TWO MORE TREATMENTS LEFT!! I am very excited to finish my chemo, put all this sickness behind me, and start growing some hair! I can’t believe it’s almost November. It feels like it went by so quickly, yet I also feel like my first treatment was so long ago.
Looking back on all I’ve been though this summer and fall, I feel like I’ve lost 6 months of my life. Cancer just came along a put a dent in my life plans. I’m not looking forward to watching my friends graduate in May 2012 like I had intended, and think “that was supposed to be me“. But the thing I have come to realize is– it wasn’t supposed to be me. One of my good friends reminded me today, God chose me to go through this. I have been called according to His purpose, and He is going to use this hard time in my life for something good.
And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. -Romans 8: 28
IN A NUTSHELL
- After a week of being sick and couple rounds of antibiotics, I’m feeling much better
- I have 2 more treatments left. woohoo!
- I’m thankful that I have only been sick once in the past 5 months and am hopeful that I will stay in good health as I finish out my last month of having a compromised immune system
- Though I feel like I have missed out on some good things because of my situation, I also realize that God is at work and His work is always perfect